Calming Your Nervous System While Diving Into the Unknown
Stepping into the unknown is scary and can be so overwhelming that it's easier to just stay put, to not make the change or to take the leap. But some of the most beautiful things in life are on the other side of fear. Everyone experiences fear, this is how we are wired to keep ourselves safe however, something that may seem “unsafe” could actually be one of the greatest catalysts to our growth.
We have three brains, the cortex (human brain), the limbic system and the brain stem (critter brain). The cortex or “human brain” deals with the logical, human, conscious mind. This is the part of us that justifies our choices and behaviors and makes meaning out of our feelings and experiences. The limbic system is in charge of generating emotions. It uses emotions to promote a sense of safety and well-being. These emotions drive us toward or away from experiences that affect love, safety and belonging. Lastly the brain stem or critter brain is in charge of the physical: your heart rate, breathing, blood sugar, anything to do with keeping you alive. It’s constantly taking a recording of the entire neural system and categorizing it in terms of risk vs. safety. The critter brain does not like change. It gets pretty set with what it knows it can survive and looks to have those same experiences over and over again. Anything new gets coded as unfamiliar.
Unfamiliar (fear) = risky = unsafe.
In order for transformation to occur, you have to get the green light in all 3 brains.
The brain stem (critter brain) has to say it’s safe - it’s not a threat to survival
The limbic system has to say it’s not a threat to love or belonging
And the Cortex has to be tickled by the idea - “oh, that’s interesting!’
So how do we get the green light on all three brains while diving into the unknown? Well you may be surprised, but it’s actually quite simple, breathing. By using breathing techniques you can actually trick your nervous system into thinking it is a calm person even when you’re totally freaking out!
Take a moment and assess what your stress level is like on a scale of 1-10 (1 being no stress and 10 being really high like you’re going to rip your hair out), especially when you’re doing something out of the norm or out of your comfort zone.
Most people are living in a constant state of stress. Success, in any area of your life, is 25% of what you’re doing and 75% who you are BEING. The more our stress levels rise, the less resources we have available within us. Also, the higher our stress levels rise,the harder it makes our immune system work and actually weakens it. In order to reach the highest levels of success we can imagine for ourselves, we need our bodies to be in good working order to continue thriving and striving forward.
Stress correlates directly to fear because it triggers our flight or fight response in the body. It puts us in survival mode, trying to protect us from anything that might bring us harm.
Have you ever noticed that when you have a thousand things seemingly happening at once you may be quicker to snap at someone when they ask you something?
That is a pretty basic example, but the point is that when we are under more stress, our focus becomes a bit more tunnel-visioned since we are just trying to survive the present circumstances. We also tend to miss out on a lot of opportunities from this place because our current bandwidth feels stretched so thin that we either don’t see the opportunity, or can’t imagine adding in yet another thing—no matter how promising or good it may be for us.
The first step to calming our nervous system is always having the awareness that we are feeling stressed or feeling fear so that we don’t fall into the loop of telling ourselves, “I am so stressed out right now” or “This is too scary, I can't do this” and letting that fuel the fire. Second is asking ourselves, “How would I like to be experiencing this situation instead?”.
It may still be stressful or scary, but by pausing to ask ourselves this question, it gives us the choice to create a new experience.
The second step is to BREATH. Relaxation can be accessed, simply, through our breath. Let’s take a look at how specifically to take those deep breaths so you can activate as much relaxation as possible.
This is what I call the 5-5-7 breath.
You’ll inhale for 5, hold for 5 and exhale for 7. So the exhale is a bit longer than the inhale.
Sit in a comfortable position, spine straight, and feet flat on the floor.
Eyes can be opened or closed. Focus on relaxing and how it feels in your body.
Inhale for 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 filling your lungs to 2/3 capacity.
Hold for 5...
Exhale for 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...
As you continue this conscious breathing, steady rhythm, scan the senses.
The scent of the air in your nose, the color of your eyelids, your taste buds, the feeling of your butt on the chair and your feet spread wide on the earth, the sound of my voice.
Inhale...hold...and exhale. Keep breathing and scanning, tuning into a heightened awareness.
Repeat 10x
This is less than 2 minutes to relaxation. You can do this anywhere and anytime and I love it because it’s free.
You can do this at the bank, when you’re in the queue at a store or even in a crowded restaurant if you are trying to enjoy a night out and you just catch yourself stressing about your finances, your job, your relationships, your health. Even when there’s chaos going on throughout your day, pay attention to who you’re being. See if you can relax into the chaos.
Stepping into the unknown doesn’t have to be as scary as you might think it is. Remember you have the power to choose how you want to experience something and your breath can make all the difference!
Just keep breathing!
xoxo,
Coach Madz
